Resolve to Finish by Beginning Again

For those considering divorce, this “merry” season can be fraught with stresses that lead to arguments, frustrations, and a sense of hopelessness. If you have been overcome by the stress of the season, I simply suggest that you take a few moments to reflect back on the moment you decided you were ready for a new start. This isn’t the moment you were filled with anger, frustration or anxiety, but the moment of clarity when you knew without question it was time to move on.

Suzuki Roshi was a Sōtō Zen monk and teacher, and is credited with saying “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities; in the expert’s mind, there are few.”

Approaching the obstacles of the season with the “beginner’s mind” will help you develop more potential options for their resolution. New traditions can be crafted, and families can be reshaped. Disagreements can be sorted out, and life can move on in a new direction. Mediation and Collaborative Law are processes that can help you stay focused on the ultimate goal rather than give in to the distractions and frustrations foisted upon us.

As the calendar turns to the New Year, resolve to finish the process already begun by focusing on that moment of clarity that truly began you on this journey. I wish you the very best in the New Year.

Martin Murphy, Esq. is a collaborative attorney and seasoned mediator. He is dedicated to using the principles and benefits of mediation and collaborative law in the general representation of businesses, their owners and in helping families facing divorce, child custody and other family law issues. The Law Office of Martin Murphy, LLC located in Norwood MA, serves clients in the surrounding communities including Attleboro, Canton, Foxboro, Franklin, Mansfield, Medfield, Medway, Millis, Norfolk, North Attleboro, Plainville, Sharon, Walpole, Westwood, and Wrentham., Marty can be reached at

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